One of my friends posted on his facebook a while back the status of "...believe Fleet Foxes has to be the biggest joke on the planet." I whole heartedly agree. Not only are the easily the most overrated band to come out in recent years, but they also suck. LIKE REALLY BAD. Not at their instruments, they just sound really really gay, to put it bluntly. They suck. HARD.

So a while back when Emma and I still worked together, she put on her ipod while we were working as she often did in the morning while we waited for the store to open and did our weekly work stuff. I guess I had a rough night the night before, because for some reason the music connected really well and I thouroughly enjoyed the album. I asked who it was and to my surprise, it was Band of Horses, a band I had heard but never paid much attention to because of their comparison to uber-shitty Fleet Foxes.

These guys don't deserve to be compared to that joke. They are 69569579597957957 times better. What Fleet Foxes lacks in simplicity and heart, Band of Horses makes up for times a thousand. You can say they are the same thing, but Band of Horses sounds like a more honest, more stripped down, and less pretentious band that simply wants to make music about how they feel. Harmonizing and vocals are great, which they are in this band, but it doesn't detract from the overall message and emotion, the way Fleet Foxes does. I feel like Fleet Foxes tries to hard to be an indie Beach Boys and their persistent vocalization/sucking of their own dicks just makes me want to break their instruments every time I hear them play. I don't know. I just hate their voices. But for some reason I like the way these guys sound. It sounds more honest, more vulnerable and less contrived.

Anyways, without getting to personal these past three months I've made a series of decisions that I completely regret. Every single one of them almost has been a mistake and if I had a time machine I would go back and change them. Hindsight is 20/20 and my beer goggles have defintely worn off. I regret a lot of things. This song by Band of Horses really strikes a chord with me especially in relation to one of those mistakes that I wish I hadn't of made. Say what you will, it's a great song and it just makes me realize how lucky I really was and how lucky I wish I still was. You never know. It can happen. Right? Okay, yeah you're right.



I don't care what you say this is five billion times better than any piece o' crap the Foxes put out. Maybe just because of its personal meaning but still: Fleet Foxes = The Death of Earnesty in music.

Scumbag Casanova

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Album Review:
EMERALDS - What Happened?

[No Fun Productions]

Do you want to have your face melted? Are you ready for the psychedelical freakout of everything you thought necessary and/or relevent? Has God ever proven himself to you by crippling your ability to fathom the capabilties of a single clover? Do you want to have every single limb in your body dipped in cid except for for face? Did you ever dream you swam with dolphins in an ocean of love and righteousness? Do you remember the first time you smoked too much weed? Do you want to have your ears plungered by the sound of pegassuses and unicorns defeating armies of the north with their lsd guitars and synthesizers? Do you like to party with the leprechauns that dance in your dream and only come out when you drink too beer and do too many hallucinogens? Do you want to smoke opium laced with meth? Do you want a ride to outer space in a beat-up chevrolet mini-van that plays nothing but Syd Barrett, The Velvet Underground, and Van Halen? Do you wish you knew what just happened? Do you want to rock so hard, the forces of time, space, and energy converge to form an unstoppable reconstruction of your life before it shatters into the brick wall that is YOUR MOTHERFUCKING METLED FACE?????

If you have answered yes to any of these questions, for the love god BUY THIS MOTHERFUCKING BEAST OF AN ALBUM!!!!!!

Grade: A

Scumbag Casanova

Monday, February 09, 2009

Look Around You

So there is this show that airs on adult swim that used to air on BBC4 earlier in this decade and it's called "Look Around You". The show is fucking brilliant. They were doing things people are only thinking of now and the execution is almost 5 times better. This show is one of the fucking funniest things I've ever seen.

The first season was shot in the manner of those cheezy 70's style video cassettes that accompanied textbooks and taught students how to do the projects and lessons in their textbooks.

Their second season was shot in the manner of those cheezy 80's style weekend morning educational shows which blended learning with "kids stuff" but really was just ten times worse.

And this is what makes the show hilarious on so many levels. The absurd facts and surreal elements are brought in such a matter-of-fact manner that you almost believe what their saying until you realize germs didn't originate in Germany. There are obvious people who are influeced by the manner in which these shows were shot and the deadpan way in which it is portrayed. But I think these men were the best and it's rightfully so: The men involved in this show all went on to be involved in things like "Shaun of the Dead" and "Hot Fuzz".

All boring facts aside, THIS IS SERIOUSLY THE SILLIEST AND FUCKING RETARDEDLY GUTBUSTING THING YOU WILL SEE THIS WEEK:




Imagine, this is what music will sound like...in the year 2000...

Scumbag Casanova

Monday, February 02, 2009

Hottie of the [past] moment: Justine Frischmann





Does anyone remember that band Elastica? They were big for a split second in the nineties and they had a couple hits here in the states but were mainly big in England? They had that song "Connection" that was really catchy and it was like part of the "alternative" momement?

Well if you do, then you remember their lead singer who was a fucking smoking hot babe by the name of Justine Frischmann. She dated Damon whats-his-face from Blur for like the entire decade but mainly she was a smoking hot, devilishly cool and just way to hot-and-cool-for-you chick that looked like she could kick your ass, outdrink you, and then give you the night of your life. SHE WAS SOOOOOO HOTTT. I recently started listening to them again, and they ruled. Elastica was an awesome band and I can't believe that buffoon from the Gorillaz was with her an entire decade and never married her!

She's managed to keep herself relevant because she lived with M.I.A and helped launch her career by helping write a bunch of the songs on "Arular". Plus she's still known in England as: Justine Frischmann, smoking hot babe for life!

Here's a little reminder of how hot she was and how much Elastica ruled to jog your memory.



- Chris