Europe is Still Weird
Okay big surprise here. Chris Moreno has never been any where other than the U.S and Mexico. Not because he doesn't want to. But because he and his parents could never afford it.

I wanted to be one of those kids sent to to Europe every year. I wanted to save up money and go to Norway or Japan. But alas, I have been flat broke since I was born and remain flat fucking broke. STILL, I have always marveled at how fucking weird Europe is. There is a stereotype (especially about Scandanavians) that paints them as weird, post-post-modern, avante-garde, synthesizer induced druggards. Bands like Kraftwerk and Aqua don't help the argument against it either.

Over the years, I've learned to respect and even admire Europeans. I want to visit Norway-Sweden-Findland and Germany in the near future. Mainly because of their sick music scenes which offer music that is far advanced than the sandboxed noobs here in America. My favorite band is Swedish for shits sake. Of course I wanna go there!

And then I see shit like this. Shit that reminds me that no matter how much people want to act like any european city is better than an American city, it's still fucking weird. Shit that makes me feel like a justifiably apprehensive and ignorant American motherfucker. This is the Swedish version of the grammys. Fever Ray won best dance album. I fucking love Fever Ray, but this is is seriously exactly how I pictured Europe when I was nine years old. This was their acceptance speech and everyone cheered like it was the greaest thing ever! I just don't understand the way Europeans think. Sometimes I think I really don't want to. It may seem ignorant as a motherfucker thats never been there but I feel that apparently I was right all along.

Remember that episode of the Simpsons where Grandpa Abe lost his paintings to that German Eurotrash and he drove away listening to Krafwerk. I somehow envisioned watching this thirteen years later and knowing this is exactly how Europe is.



Of course not everything about Europe is fucked. This is weird. But fucking amazing. I await the day I'm in Umea and can feel both alienated and enamored with shit as weird as this continent. This song rules:


That's it for my xenophobe talk. Anyone wanna pay for my ticket to Oslo?

- Espedal or Bust

Scumbag Casanova

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Album Review: Daughters - S/T


I don't think I've ever been so horny after listening to an album. Daughters have always been the kings of what I like to call sleazecore: a mixture of post-metal, mathcore and tasteless raunch. The first self-titled ep was a lesson in short-fast and grimy grindcore with vocals that seemed to come out of Lex's disdain for keeping his pants on. Screeches, howls, screams; it definitely sounded like he was fucking to death. When Canada Songs came out, I was all over that record as it only continued to further their reputation as kings of sleaze with post-modern porno lyrics.

Then the band did an about face on their last album, which turned out to be the best decision they could ever make. They stopped blasting so hard, they stopped trying to sound anything like grind, and Lex stopped screaming. What resulted was their raunchiest and most foul record to date in "Hell Songs". As opposed to fucking himself to death, Lex now sounded like a drunken sailor from Providence ready to blow his load at the sound of a screeching guitar. Hence the lyrics, "like a roman candle when I get off".

That leads us to this album which while I'm undecided if it's their best, is definitely another milestone in the Daughters lineage. Daughters maintain their sexual ferocity, even amping it up a little on this album, with guitars that are less angular and more jarring than anything. I was surprised to hear so much distortion put on them, but very very pleased with what I heard. Lyrically, the album retains much of that post-modern horniness they fucked with in their early days and mixes it with the newer style of Lex's vocals and storytelling lyrics. The result is a mixture of brilliant hyperbole and just flat out fucking sick ass lines.

The lead single "The First Supper" is a perfect example of how amazing this album is. It has everything from high pitched guitar parts to the soul-crushing breakdowns that make every Daughters show such an amazing thing to be a part of. It has a tad bit more of a dancy, spazzy, beat to it, which is another new facet of this band. The album flows almost incoherently in a drunken fashion much in the same way "Hell Songs" did, only where Hell relented in their aggression, Daughters "S/T" just keeps punishing and punishing. Think your drunk uncle stumbling around belligerently and constantly sexually harassing your girlfriend or your mom before going home and angrily fucking a hoooker.

The album isn't all flash and weiners though. Lyrically Daughters have perfected their craft and their style so well that the metaphors at times seem completely harmless and introspective. I guess that's their trick for getting you. Further inspection shows these guys are still sleazy enough to make you cringe and that no one does it better. The sound, the vocals, the words, everything blends in perfectly to create an album that is not only brutal in aural aspects but smart, inquisitive and downright crude/sexy all together. Each song is carefully crafted with tongues placed firmly on cheeks, what type of cheek are we talking about? Well I guess you're just going to have to find out for yourself.

There is debate as to whether or not this will be their last album. Daughters have announced they will not be touring in support of it, and three of the five members have quit for unknown reasons, although reading and watching interviews with Lex, it can't be hard to figure out. If this is their last album, then it is a fitting way to go out. It is a great swan song for a band that in my eyes is extremely underrated and one of the more progressive bands in their genre (more so than the Locust, Some Girls, etc.). At least if they are done, Daughters go out on top (or on the bottom depending on how drunk and tired they are). They came in kicking and screaming and go out in a drunken blaze of gunshots and rimjobs. Hey at least they went out with a bang, which I guess is how they first started: kickin and screamin, hangin and bangin.

Grade: A

Here's the first single off the album, "The First Supper".


- 8============)---

Scumbag Casanova

Monday, March 01, 2010

I said "so" a lot in my last entry. Therefore with this latest entry, you got to see that my vocabulary extends past words with one syllable.

Oh yeah, this rules:



an awesome song (no I'm not kidding) from one of my favorite movies of all time.

- Love.